Hey gearbox. I was directed here from /v/ and dA.
I fixed Borderlands 2's ending.
Let's be honest - it wasn't what we deserved. Borderlands 2 is fantastic. Handsome Jack? Flippin' fantastic. The ending? Not fantastic at all.
I've got a few things before the story itself. The first is a link to in on fanfiction. The formatting is nicer there.
The second is a disclaimer that I own nothing and please, Gearbox, there's still time to make it right. DLC 5: We've Fixed Everything sounds pretty nice. Don't even need to put me in the credits. But seriously, Gearbox, at least read it. I've put a huge amount of work into this. It helps the game bridge the gap from parody to meaningful.
The third is a warning about the formatting. I wrapped it in quote tags because it is a HUGE wall of text and this way you can tell when it ends. If you're annoyed, read it on fanfiction or suggest somewhere else I can post it. I'm sorry about the formatting - I really am.
The fourth is this. It will make a lot more sense after you read the story.
Warning: It's a huge wall of text. Also, it's got some language. And a lot of spoilers.
I fixed Borderlands 2's ending.
Let's be honest - it wasn't what we deserved. Borderlands 2 is fantastic. Handsome Jack? Flippin' fantastic. The ending? Not fantastic at all.
I've got a few things before the story itself. The first is a link to in on fanfiction. The formatting is nicer there.
The second is a disclaimer that I own nothing and please, Gearbox, there's still time to make it right. DLC 5: We've Fixed Everything sounds pretty nice. Don't even need to put me in the credits. But seriously, Gearbox, at least read it. I've put a huge amount of work into this. It helps the game bridge the gap from parody to meaningful.
The third is a warning about the formatting. I wrapped it in quote tags because it is a HUGE wall of text and this way you can tell when it ends. If you're annoyed, read it on fanfiction or suggest somewhere else I can post it. I'm sorry about the formatting - I really am.
The fourth is this. It will make a lot more sense after you read the story.
Warning: It's a huge wall of text. Also, it's got some language. And a lot of spoilers.
Quote:
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There is no way someone like Handsome Jack could kill a whole bunch of people and survive. I mean, he's hilarious and brilliant and handsome and apparently pretty strong, but he relies exclusively on expensive tech he doesn't have at the beginning of the story. It makes no logical sense for him to be able to assassinate and threaten his way to the top of Hyperion. As someone who hadn't played BL1 and was guessing at the plot all throughout BL2, I was SO GODDAMN SURE the ending would have turned out to be the biggest twist of all. In order to explain, I'll start at the beginning. In the game Jack's goal was Eridium. He wanted Eridium, needed Eridium. For Angel, right? Angel was being pumped with Eridium for a very specific reason - to boost her powers and charge the vault key. I think the game should have ended with the vault hunters, as well as what's left of the BL1 vault hunters, standing in front of the vault. With no key. And the vault doesn't open. The key didn't charge. The key was a really long, really elaborate ruse. What better to use as a disguise for needing all the Eridium on Pandora? And the vault never does open. Jack wasn't charging the key. Because Jack is a mother****ing siren. I'll type it again, just in case you missed it. Jack is a siren. It all fits. Minus the final fights, of course. Editing the final two bosses (Jack and the Warrior) out, it all fits. I'll start with the Eridium. Jack's been looking for it for a while. He knew Pandora would have it, and used his powers to get himself into the ruling body of Hyperion. He started small - making the shareholders give up their spots and eventually strangling (not choking) the life out of the people who resisted or grew suspicious. He used his powers to slowly gain control of the entire operation. His powers? What powers? I'm glad you asked. Jack can force people to obey him. He can also control other sirens. Plus, he has the basic super strength/flying that comes with being a siren. "Wait what?" you just asked. Just hold on. Let me finish explaining. Easiest first: Jack's got pretty unnatural strength. He was able to literally crush someone's windpipe with a watch chain while joking about it. He's also pretty damn tough to kill, despite not actually wearing body armor. He's also able to punch Lilith in the throat so hard she collapses. Jack's real power, though, is in manipulation. He can bend weak willed people to his control. The siren collars? They're meaningless. A distraction. He can force sirens to do things they don't want to do via his own siren shenanigans. And even if it is the collars that allow him to control sirens, how the hell does he know so much about them? Sirens aren't exactly common knowledge. The biggest part of this is that Jack can steal siren powers from other sirens. Angel's mentioned a few key points here. "Don't listen to his voice." "This is what he does. He makes you think that it's your fault. Don't listen!" "The key charges itself naturally once every 200 years. Jack's patient, but not that patient." 200 years? Patient? He's using Eridium to extend his life. That's why Angel hasn't revolted earlier. She's been under his control for a long time - much longer than the five years you would assume. He's been pumping her full of Eridium so he can feed off her siren powers and use her to keep him strong while he is waiting to finish mining Pandora. It's everywhere. Listen to his lines. He knows. He's been playing with the vault hunters to pass the time. He needs Eridium to charge his siren powers, and he needed Angel to keep feeding off of other sirens. Here's the big one, though, and this will be the one to win you over. The mask. What does every siren have? Tattoos. That's what under the mask, not some stupid brand. Something that only a siren could have. I really don't like Jack's "real" face. The vault brand was a cool idea, yeah, but it needed an explanation. With no story it's just kind of a "oh hey yeah he was hiding this" moment rather than an "OH MY GOD WHAT" moment. He's a siren, and a really powerful one. And the final boss should have been him, not some stupid "god" that somehow came with a big target carved into his chest. It should have been the plot twist of the series, and of the century, and it would have been the ending he deserves. And to those who say "wait stop Sirens can only be girls it says so on the wiki" That's another thing I noticed. No one ever, and I mean ever, mentions sirens needing to be female. 4/6 being female is a majority, yes, but it's not 100%. The only reason people claim they are all girls is because there hasn't been a male siren yet. SPECULATION - THE FOLLOWING IS NOT BASED ON FACT, UNLIKE THE REST OF THIS That's yet another thing. Only six in the universe, right? What if (and this is a big leap) Jack's wife/Angels' mom was a siren? And when Angel got her powers, she killed her... and the powers jumped to Jack? That would explain a lot. He's protective of Angel... but keeps her restrained. He's afraid of her powers. He's afraid she'll kill him, too. He misses his wife more than anything, and loves Angel, but he's scared. END SPECULATION And yes. He's also really really smart. At the beginning of our story, Jack was a programmer. Smart. He was able to hack into Hyperion to deploy the satellite. He was also able to manipulate his way up the Hyperion ladder without tipping off too many people. And he was able to find a place that sells diamond ponies. The first quote from a while back was in Angel's room. It may help to listen to Angel's voice clips. She's not just obeying Jack, she's terrified - and still acts friendly and professional. She knows just what he is and just what she did, and doesn't want to give him a reason. Too many pieces fit. Plus, I really don't like hearing him beg for his life every time I beat the game. At this point, there's only one loose end - the entire ******* Hyperion respawn system. I know, I know - Gearbox says it isn't cannon. But what if it was? Because I can fit that in, too. And it can be explained by Jack's personality. I mean, holy crap. Why would Hyperion build something like that? For fun? Yep. For fun. It's probably boring being the king of Pandora. And keeping vault hunters alive for a while must be pretty fun. Jack's watching everything you do, you know. He probably chuckles a bit every time you fall off cliffs or die to robots or bullymongs. Maybe he's drinking coffee or something and spits it out whenever you die in a particularly painful way. I dunno. But Jack controls it. He's at first letting you die over and over for fun. Then, after Angel dies... he wants to kill you himself. But the point is that he definitely controls it. Why else would you and the bandits respawn but not Roland or any of the other vault hunters? Because it's a game to Jack. It's his game, not yours. He may not be the hero, but he sure as hell was the main character. So I picture the better ending like this... The Vault of the Warrior. The vault hunters, new and old, stare at Jack. A boss title screen flashes for Jack. But he doesn't fight. He just stands there. And laughs, softly. "I thought you guys would figure it out, you know. I gave you all the clues. It's been so much fun leading you all around this god-forsaken planet, but hey. Good times have to end eventually, eh kiddies?" "Where's Lilith?" "You can have her." *snap* "Boom. Lunar base just fired her down. She's in Banditville with the rest of your so called resistance." "... ?" "I mean, if you wanted to go up and get her be my guest. But I don't really need her anymore. Oh, also, make sure she doesn't move around too much for the next few weeks, okay? She's gonna be a bit lightheaded." "... ???" "Hey, just be glad I didn't kill her. It was tempting, though. Damn shame about the vault, by the way. I know you kiddos were just so excited." "... ???????????????????" "What, you geniuses haven't figured it out yet? I didn't charge the stupid key. It was a trick! The whole time! Now do me a favor and die." Game on. Fight time. Exactly the same as the normal Jack fight, maybe a little easier. Jack is defeated. He bleeds out while laughing. The end... And the scene pans from the celebrating vault hunters to a respawn terminal, where the newly digistructed Jack is leaning, amused, while raising an eyebrow. "Like I said. Cute." "... ****..." "Well, it's been fun. Really, it has. But you killed my baby girl, and for that..." *snap* digi-warps away, camera pans to lunar base... (over ECHO) "... you're gonna die, Vault Hunters." A giant Loader drops out of the sky... And the lunar base starts blowing up Pandora. Tannis gets you on ECHO. "He's charging a huge beam of energy from the lunar base. If it hits, Pandora is done for. You've gotta get up there and kill him before it's too late." The vault hunters kill the Loader. Lootsplosion, etc. This will be the respawning fight that will be farmed at the end of the game. This way it won't mess up with the real boss fight, which will only be accessable once. The robot will drop something to use on the Fast Travel network. The heroes go use the respawn/fast travel terminal to warp to the lunar base and prepare for the final fight. This is it. The end. The point of no return. And they end up warping to Jack's bedroom. It's somberly decorated, but obviously his. A large Eridium pump hangs next to the bed. A pair of fluffy Skag slippers smile into the eerie calm. A picture of Butt Stallion reflects the light. It's got a good view, though - the entirety of Pandora lights up like a huge city through a giant glass window. You can see the Blight, the glacier, the Highland, even Sactuary and the hole where Sanctuary was. It's quiet. The faint hum of machinery and the rush of flowing liquid fills the silence. The game fades to cinematic. Your vault hunter looks around... and spies Jack's mask on the bedside table. The vault hunter walks over, glances around, picks up the mask. It's only got one real eye hole - his blue eye is real, but the green eye is not. Hyperion cybernetics are all along the back of the mask. This is how Jack is plugged into Hyperion! The vault hunter raises the mask to eye level, looks through the eye hole. The screen is black, save the hole you are looking through. The camera slowly pans over to a door that has just opened. Jack is looking into a mirror in his bathroom while brushing his teeth. He is shirt and maskless. He is wearing boxers with vault symbols on them. Large dark purple siren tattoos cover his back and chest and some of his legs. His right eye looks to be torn out - Eridium tainted skin extends from the scar. Siren tattoos are all around his blind eye. The scene pauses for a second... and then Jack locks eye(s) with your vault hunter. Pause. "S**t." He turns, faster than you can react, and slams the close door button. Silence for at least 10 seconds. The camera jumps from you to the mask to Mordecai to Brick. All have their mouths open in complete surprise. Brick breaks the silence. "He's a... siren." Mordecai nods, swallows. "I... did not... see that coming." A few moments later, the door is blown open from the inside. Jack is fully clothed - minus the mask - and he looks pissed. "Give me back my mask, bandit." "GET HIM!" Mordecai jumps toward Jack, draws his sword. Jack slams him away with a blast of concentrated siren power from an open palm. His eye starts to glow with Eridium pink color. Wings slowly start appearing. The outline of his tattoos starts to faintly glow through his clothes. "I'm only going to ask this one more time. Give. Me back. My mask." Camera swings away to show the vault hunters draw their guns. A full barrage of bullets fires toward Jack. He sneers, pushes his hand outward. A shield of energy materializes. "Not this time. I'm only holding back because I like the way this room is decorated." Cut to Brick. "You blew up the door, idiot." Jack closes his eyes in anger, exhales. "Alright, you know what?" Eyes flash, tattoos glow. *snap* Jack uses Lilith's stolen power to phase shift the entire group into a large storage hangar. "F**k you, vault hunters." He jumps into the air. An explosion of power shakes the area. The second Jack title screen flashes up, showcasing his glowing eyes, wings, and tattoos in all their badass glory. The subtitle? "THE END" Here it is. Here's the final ******* boss. You wanted badass? Here's ******* badass. The entire first fight will be Jack in mid air, flying with his siren wings. Maybe shooting siren stuff out of his eyes or something, whatever. Blowing **** up with crazy powers while ranting about killing us all. He uses phaseshift a lot, much to the anger of Mordecai and Brick. If you die, you respawn to a quote from Jack. Something along the lines of "I'm not letting you die that easily." The vault hunters finally kill Jack... and he respawns. Now we see the problem with this story. Now we see how the fight's going to end. Now we know why he's so ******* confident - he's immortal. But you do notice something strange... Every time he respawns, the explosion of power needed to rez him loosens the New-U terminal from its resting place. If you kill him enough, you might be able to move the terminal. Three stages. Think the Handsome Sorcerer fight. Straight old-fashioned shoot-the-bad-guy-till-he-dies fights. Each time it gets worse. And each time, an explosion pushes the respawn terminal closer to an airlock. You kill Jack the third and final time... ... and just as he is going to respawn, the vault hunters push the respawn terminal out into open space, leaving him forever dying and respawning over and over again. The vault hunters then blow up the entire ******* lunar base. I mean, it's kind of up to you if you think it would be a good ending. Honestly, I would love it. The credits could have shots of the gang looking away from the exploding lunar base. For the rest of the game in that playthrough, the base could be exploded, giving a permanent sense of completion. Plus, you'd know that whatever the hell Jack is, he gave up one heck of a fight. |